Sunday, August 14, 2011

All I Need

A quote I've heard a lot recently is "You don't know Christ is all you need until Christ is all you have."
I've never been at a place in my life where I've had to truly cling to that sentence.
I am certain that Christ had me come to Fayetteville for multiple reasons, but I think the most prominent one right now is so that I will truly embrace that statement and grow so much from it.
Being an outsider isn't easy and definitely isn't fun in a new city. At first I saw it as something was wrong with me and that I was the one who needed to change. However, my convictions are deep in my skin and I cannot change who I am because of the people around me. God put me here for a reason, and if I stumble just to please people...I won't be doing His work. I'll be doing mine. What is temporary satisfaction worth compared to a loving God who is there no matter what. My favorite show Gilmore Girls has a scene where Rory is feeling like an outsider and she says "Just call me Pony Boy." I can relate to that right now. I am the outsider. But instead of seeing this as a bad thing, God has shown me that being an outsider to the world is part of the job description. An outsider isn't a bad title when you look at the rewards on the other side.
I love Fayetteville. Don't get me wrong. I am enjoying the things I'm learning and love my clinical site that Im at right now. I am learning a ton. I am eager to get more plugged in with Fellowship NWA here. I see God doing great things during my two years here. But, the past few days have been rough. Little community and fellowship isn't easy. I see the importance of a strong community of believers. Without my core support group here (family and friends back home) I am on my own. I have an amazing couple (mike and allison) here with me. And I am so grateful for them being here and opening their house to me. But they are my only true support in the city right now. God has grown me the past few days learning to rely on Him and Him alone. Life isn't always picture perfect. The past few days the quote "You don't know Christ is all you need until Christ is all you have" has become quite true. I know in reality I havent lost my family or friends, but they are not readily available for me to run to. The five hours drive isn't bad, but it's too much when you don't have ten hours to spend on the road.
I am excited about what Christ is doing in and through me. And I am also learning that He is all I need.